When I met you six or so years ago, our entire relationship was chaotic. I thought by now that maybe it would not have been so chaotic. Marriage is bliss, right? A few days ago, it was revealed by the heart of my Father as to why it's been so chaotic. My heart grieves for you, my husband. It sees your destruction at hand, knowing full well that this battle for your life, God's plans for your life, for your very soul could very well go either way. My heart grieves because you're so far away these days. This marriage is going through a test like no other. I never know what side of you I will see on this day. I may have my man is a knight in shining armor day, full of gentleness and tenderness and love. Or it may be a day where your anger, your pride, your hatred, your bitterness, all the works of the flesh have overpowered you and none of your family can stand against the onslaught, all of us cowering in fear of the show at hand.
But you asked me today if things were ever going to change. And the answer is I BELIEVE so much in the power of God working in you, that He will indeed carry you to the day of completion in Christ Jesus, that I know that they will permanently change. The frustration will be gone in your life. A complete freedom is coming to you; every chain will be broken off of your life and off your torrid past. You will see and feel things in light of God's love for you. I know it will happen because He's done a great work in me.
But in the meantime, oh, how my heart grieves. The depth of the grief in my spirit for you is nothing I've ever felt before. The only thing that could possibly break my heart in such a way from watching your life is happening before my very eyes. I will stay with you and stand with you right by your side, ready to fully enjoy life with you and watch as the Father restores you. I know the hard fall is coming soon. And when the scales drop from your eyes, just know that you can come to me, and I will still love you then as much as I love you now, yet I know I will love you even more.
What I know more about you than anything is God gave you a persevering spirit. I have watched you rise up time and again after being knocked down. There is something so wonderful in you, so beautiful in you that I know my heart will rejoice in the joy of your salvation as much as it is grieving and heavy right now.
I do believe in you, and I still love you even when you're so far away.